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Thanks to my readers! Thank you for your interest, motivation, encouragement, comments and inputs. I'm waiting for critiques to help me improve.

I found out that you can follow my blog so that you don't miss out on a single post. Nonetheless, I'll still notify you through my BBM status, FB and Twitter account but just in case you miss my notification, you can have another.

For those who read on a mobile device, once you are on www.kdamsel.blogspot.com choose the option on the bottom of the page to "view web version."
If you are viewing on a non-mobile device, once you are on www.kdamsel.blogspot.com scroll to the far right. You'll see an option to "join this site". You can join through your google, twitter or yahoo account. You can also choose to join privately or publicly.

I assume you'll receive notification when I post anything. Don't worry, I only post when something blog-worthy happens so you won't loose sleep from my notifications.

I have included some screenshots to make it easier to find what I've described above. Don't forget to keep the comments coming. *kisses n hug*

~kdamsel~

A Corper's worst nightmare

Every Corper's worst nightmare would be getting an extension on the already very long one year. You know how Nigerians like to start any kinda meeting with a prayer (even a meeting on how to embezzle other people's money)? During our orientation, the school officials and students that said the opening and closing prayers included this line "may we not get an extension during this service year" LOL. That's how serious it is.

Normally, school closes at 2pm except on Fridays when closing is 1pm. Let's just say that I have never heard the closing bell (and my punctuality deficiency has resurfaced again so I haven't witnessed the assembly after the first week). I work with my friend and we leave the school when we finish teaching the latest period. Whoever finishes first wastes time till the other is done and we'll go do something or go home after.

So, on this blessed day, we left a little after 12pm. I had an amala moment, so we went to the bank first, ate amala at our favorite amala place and went to the pharmacy to pick up a few items (this pharmacy has everything, even things I stocked up on from Toronto). Anyways, we parted ways because she gets off the bus shortly before I do. I got a BBM message from a colleague saying that a LG representative was in school. Apparently, they come around every now and then to have Corpers sign in as documentation to decipher who doesn't come regularly or who doesn't stay till 2pm.

I thought my colleague was lying till I started receiving calls from other people. Right when I got to my doorstep, I got that last call and I figured it wasn't a joke. The perks of living significantly close to the school. I carried my farmer looking legs(when I leave the school, I look like a farmer's kid because the school isn't tared, tones of sand and dust) and wanted to hop on a bike but I really try to avoid bikes plus I was wearing one helluva tight skirt. I hopped on the bus and met up with my friend at the school entrance. I had called her to rush back to school before the representative left. There was so much adrenaline in the air as Corpers we didn't see throughout last week suddenly arrived on scene to sign, a couple smelling like bathing soap. Everyone calling someone absent and others cooking up ways to help their colleagues sign. We eventually signed and headed
back on the street to go back home AGAIN! Lol.

I'm sure it won't be a big deal if you were absent for one or two of these things but seriously, I don't even wanna find out. However, that doesn't mean I'm staying in school till closing EVER! I'll just keep praying "may I not get an extension on my service year." lol. My threshold for Osogbo cannot extend beyond the one year commitment. It just cannot!

I found out why all schools in Osun state now have the same uniforms. I'll share in my next post along with the reasons why I haven't updated you all on the alleged agbaya and student issue I mentioned in my last post. This post is long enough and I'm roasting.

~kdamsel~

Corper-student relationships

There's an appalling issue that I heard about before I started teaching and now I'm seeing it.

First of all, my students are loving me more and more. They know when to get serious and when to laugh. The ones I don't teach wanna know my name, the ones I'm teaching can't stop trying to get my attention when I walk by them. The girls will hook arms with me while I walk and walk me to my office after class. They will gimme gist about their life and school and play with my hair while I stand beside them. It's just amazing. I adore almost all of them because they are interesting characters.

During our orientation, school officials mentioned something. They pleaded with female Corpers not to get pregnant by school boys and male Corpers not to impregnate their female students. We all laughed at the issue as if it wasn't a possibility. The issue now is, Corpers dating and sleeping with students. I have heard many shocking gists about Corpers and students dating since we were in camp. At the moment, I have not witnessed a male student/ female Corper relationship yet but I have been noticing, particularly one female student and a male Corper. Now, this girl has gotta be the cutest girl in junior high. She is gorgeous and brilliant but I won't mention her features or characteristics for safety and privacy purposes. Yesterday, I noticed a male Corper engaging in an intense, one-on-one conversation with her in her classroom, at her desk during their lunch break. I could just imagine what exactly he might have been talking to her about. I must say that I was quite disgusted at the thought and trust your girl, I took a picture(I'm sure the nosy people wanna see it but I definitely can't post it). I don't know what I'll need the pic for but I like doing paparazzi work. Anyways, I wanna stop this from happening or at least try to stop it whenever I notice such connections forming. I could just mind my business but what kinda person would I be? I can't speak to my fellow Corper because they know and I know that what they are doing is quite fucked up but I will talk to the girl. I'll do the work from that end and hopefully I can make a difference and save her from these agbayas (my translation - dirty old fools, for my non-Nigerian readers).

Now, on to the not so appalling issues. The governor of Osun state decided to have all the students in Osun state wear the same uniforms. How absurd is that? Just Imagine. One cannot link a student to a particular school. The sad part is that I'm sure the idiots around him when he made the rule were nodding and smiling and telling him what a brilliant idea he had just come up with. A table of fools, greedy people and ass kissers. Smh. Although, I've never spoken with him before and I have no idea why he made that decision, I have searched my brain and I can't figure out why on earth. However, the senior school uniforms resemble Ankara textile. It's lovely and true to the Yoruba culture. Nonetheless, stupid idea to have all students in the state wearing the same clothes Mondays to Fridays.

Also, there are rumors/talks that they might increase alawee/alawi(Corpers' federal allowance) to N33,000 from the current monthly N19,800(on top of that N19,800, Osun state gives Corpers N5,000). While I believe the rule should not apply to us seeing how we enrolled before they passed the bill, I've been hearing otherwise. If we do get it, all I gotta say is 'that's wassup.' At least it will increase the minimum wage in the country as discussed in our staff room. I can't imagine people work for less than N19,800. May God help us.

~kdamsel~

Aje-Butter Beatings (ABB)

I am guilty of beating my students. However, the cane has become my advocate. You'll see an example of a time I was forced to inflict some "aje-butter" physical pain on a student later on in this post. A colleague of mine tagged my corporal punishment skills as such because apparently, I don't whip the cane hard enough and I restrict the beating to their palms. Also, I overheard a student telling the next student up for beating that it doesn't hurt and he shouldn't worry too much. Lol.

The English department does not have a single permanent teacher. All the teachers are Corpers. Funny how they just gave us the curriculum and said "get teaching." Due to my personality, I take every duty I'm assigned seriously, so I really wanna teach the hell outta English but it's difficult. The foundation is already twisted and because they have Corper teachers, I imagine many of them just come to class, deliver a lesson with mediocrity and leave. After all, they are gone in 9 months, so whatever happens, happens. But this is someone's future and I wish the government would invest in more permanent teachers.

For example:
I was marking homework on a Friday, which I assigned on the Wednesday. I always flip back a couple pages to see if the student submitted the last homework and I realized the girl had not submitted a single homework since I started teaching them (about 4 in total). I called her in and we had a conversation.

Me: you have not submitted ANY homework since the term started
Student: Aunty, I did not have the book(what she really meant was that she does not have the textbook)
Me: and you think now is the the right time to say this?
Student: I did not have textbook
Me: what about the one I gave you on Tuesday? The last homework. Were you in class?
Student: no Aunty. I am not in class then when you give us.

This student at JSS3 cannot even speak in appropriate tenses. I realize that I cannot save them but I will do the best I can. Needless to say that I gave this girl 3 ABB for taking her homework for granted.

I passed my boundary one day and assigned a 5 sentence summary of a passage we read in class. Oh my God!! Big mistake. I endured marking class A's homework. I spent half my time trying to figure out what they were trying to say. When I got to class B's I just checked to see if they were done and gave 5 for effort. I could not bear reading anymore. I was frustrated. No joke, no exaggerating. On a different day, I asked for 10 sentences in relation to the day's lesson and one of my male students wrote "I like your tatto on your back" (those kids must have x-ray vision or something).

Each day gets better though. They like me more, I like them more, we have fun in class, I allow them to clown a little and we get serious when it's time to work. But my aje-butter beatings have been efficient though. I make sure I don't abuse the power. The goal is to gain their cooperation and respect immediately so that the need to use the cane will decrease with time because they really do take Corpers(especially female Corpers) for granted. However, so far, so good.

I swear I have been abiding by their dress codes yet they complained about 2 of my skirt lengths and earrings. Surprisingly, no one talks about the nose ring. When they complained, I let them know that I was positive my skirts (an inch above the knee) were appropriate by every standard, even church. I sport some long ones also, so I mix 'em up. I mean, a girl can only have so many skirts. However, I don't argue, I don't get vexed, I just say that I understand, I apologize and wear them again and again. Let's see who tires out first :D

~kdamsel~

Village teaching

Before I begin my post (because I know everyone is dying to know how being a village teacher is going) I would like to share one of the oddest incidents ever. I was at a church in New York. I forget the name of the church but it was after church and I was standing outside between the parking lot and the church. I was waiting for the people who invited me to wind up their meets & greets. That was when a boy who was walking from the church to the parking lot kissed me on the lips. Ofcourse I was shocked. I was confused. When he leaned in, I thought he wanted to welcome me with a hug because I had stood up when they asked first timers to identify themselves by standing up. Anyways, he kissed me and walked away. Not a word, not a smile.

The teaching, it's going alright so far. I have met my students: JSS3A & JSS3B. When I was introduced as their English teacher, they screamed and clapped. And I followed with a "shut up jor, why are you making noise, don't u have your own names?" As corny as it was, it made them laugh.

So, catch this, the period is 40mins long and I must have spent the whole 40mins trying to quiet them down. I really wanted to try the 'no beating thing'. After all, it worked on us when I was in middle school and high school in Toronto. But I feel that the kids don't respect Corpers especially people like me because they are almost as big as I am. So, I have decided to engage in corporal punishment. Before I made my decision, I wondered why that should be the answer to getting the students to cooperate. Mind you, these students of mine speak perfect Yoruba in the Osun dialect, not regular Yoruba(not that it has anything to do with corporal punishment but I want you all to know). They actually took turns to read in English and it wasn't bad at all. I was quite impressed. They pronounced big words properly in most cases.

While I wondered why corporal punishment was the answer, I figured it's because parents have no patience for their children and beating your child is usually the fastest punishment. The maximum force becomes the only way to get a kid's cooperation. In the West, they threatened us with writing lines and we shut up. Then punishment escalates to detention, getting written up by the principal and what not. So, anyways, I have decided to give them a trial with physical punishments and lines even though I'm convinced I'll be wasting my time. I'll still try.

I got my curriculum and I already gave them homework due on Monday. They were really loud so I doubt some of them heard, neither will they bother doing it because I didn't write it down and they might think I forgot. I will make those who do not hand in their homework scapegoats and see if that will serve as a deterrent. I'm on a quest to attain respect from my students even when I'm playing with them.

They made fun of my accent. I tried my hardest to dull down the phonetics but I can only try so hard. I even speak Yoruba sometimes when I wanna say something funny.

#randomthot: One thing downtown Toronto and Osogbo have in common is that you can wear a hair net on the road and no one gives a shit. I couldn't try that in Lagos. I like the freedom cuz I don't always enjoy combing my weave. But not to my PPA ofcourse. Just to buy something, walk someone or even go to the market.

I didn't find my crush at CDS. I wasnt even able to locate my CDS group (EFCC). Even the workers at the LG had no information to give Corpers on where certain groups meet. Only in Nigeria. I give up on my crush for now. Im hoping I see him at general CDS meeting, which holds on the first Thursday of every month at the LG and EVERY single Corper registered with the Osogbo LG is supposed to be present and if I don't see him there, it's over.

I'm going to church after a year and change today. #dontjudgeme. I'll blog about it if it's worth it.

~kdamsel~

First week

Where do I begin? Hmmm. So much has transpired in my first week back and I wanna tell it all but I can't remember all the events. Very interesting also.

Anyways. I've been to my PPA and I will be teaching English at the J.S.S 3 level. The downside to this is that I have classes twice a day, 4 days a week. It's 4 days instead of 5 because we have CDS every Thursday and we all get to miss our PPAs (can't be in two places at once, ya know). I will save the student-teacher bond I develop with my students for a later date. When they have all fallen in love with me cuz it's bound to happen, with me being so amazing and all :D.The school has a few dress codes that I wanna share with you guys.

Guys cannot wear necklaces/ chains or whatever around their necks. They are encouraged to tuck in their shirts when they are wearing one. They cannot sag their pants but they can wear jeans that have no holes or tears in them.

As for girls, sleeveless tops are not encouraged but you can wear them as long as they are not cut too steep around the armpits. No bogus neck jewelry and earrings. Long weaves have to be rolled up. Absolutely no pants or leggings. We can only wear skirts(or tie wrappers) but no short skirts. Lastly, no painting of the face but you can wear slight make up. Surprisingly, no one has said anything about my nose and extra ear piercings YET!

My apartment is almost furnished to my taste but my parents still want me to redeploy to Lagos. And really, today I was on the korope(Osogbo public buses) and I said to my colleague, "I can't believe I'm on a bus in Osogbo." Nobody in this world could tell me that I would end up and live with being in this town 4 months go. It would have been quite absurd. However, I don't mind staying. My biggest fear with redeploying is that, many people who have tried to redeploy to Lagos have ended up in neighboring states like Oyo, Ogun and what not because they just could not be posted to Lagos. Now, as sure as this link is and as crazy as this may sound, I have come to believe that this is where I'm supposed to be. Also, if for whatever reason, the connect fails, I would end up in a different state and it would suck ass if that happens. That means readjusting, reprogramming and re-channeling my brain to another state that isn't Lagos or Osun. I don't have the strength or endurance for such an occurrence. NONE whatsoever. I have already reached my threshold when I ended up in Ede for camp 4 days after returning from Toronto. As unreal and unserious as it may sound, it wasn't easy. It took a lot more than my blog conveyed. I wanted to call it quits many times but I just couldn't p***y out from what I started already. It's just not my style. When I see other people who went overseas for 4 years of university, come back and act like they aren't from Nigeria and it's the worst thing for them to be in a village, I just roll my eyes and 'yimu' at them.

A little story b4 I end this. I saw a friend whom I've only seen in America (and the last time was in 2008) in Osogbo today(that's wild right?) and we hung out for a bit b4 he headed back with his fam to where they originally came to Osun state for. When they were leaving, I hitched a ride to the main street with them to catch a korope and come home. When I hugged him goodbye, he said "Mama, I dey leave u for Osogbo, make u dey roll with us cuz this is weird." (Mama is what the fam and a few friends call me). I laughed and thought about it again and said "nah man. I'm cool still. I'll hop on the bus and I'm home in a bit." I'm gangsta like that. Life is what you make it.

Tomorrow is our first CD meeting and I'm hoping to God I see my crush. I'll keep you all posted.

~kdamsel~

Osogbo 2013

It's funny how everyone's pants are hitched. Lol. I just tuck the ends of mine into my socks to save me from looking ridiculous. However, the pants are a hot mess. There can't be any fabric cheaper than the NYSC's khakis. My pants have a tear in the crotch area and my pockets bottom stitches are almost fully out so if I put anything in there, it's most probable that I won't find it when I reach my destination. That's a habit I'm trying to break when I wear those pants.

I got an apartment but it's not anywhere close to what I described in my previous post. Ofcourse I was aware that my father would have to build me that house (the same kind I described in my last post) if I wanted it in Osogbo. Speaking of father, my parents were just phenomenal. They set me up proper. I feel like I should be more responsible because I'm actually an adult whether I like it or not. They took it upon themselves to ensure that I would not need anything and whatever I needed would be easy to reach and money can buy it. I'm very lucky. #thankful

What I got was a room with my own bathroom and toilet. It's got one of those washrooms I hate. You know those ones where your toilet and everything else gets wet when you have your shower because there is no bathtub or a shower stall? Yea. Those ones. I have a shower though. But I probably won't use it much because hot water doesn't dispense from it. I would have to boil water and mix it with cold water and 'baf' because it get pretty chilli in the mornings and nights in Osogbo but I love it. The kitchen, I'm sharing with 2 other ladies and I really dreaded the idea of sharing any living spaces but I had no choice man. The whole house is not bad actually. It's clean and fairly new and the ladies in the building are very friendly and most of all, they mind their own businesses. The downside to this place is that you can hear everything your neighbours say or do & vice versa. The landlord did not think about putting bricks between the units for proper demarcation or perhaps it was more important for him to save as much as possible. The amazing part of this town is that there is always power. PHCN in this part of the country is not such a bitch.

The sad thing was, I had to send Jagger home. This place is not ideal for him. The ladies actually didn't mind having him around but he slept by the door on our first night, all night, wanting to go outside at odd times. I imagine he was thinking "mommy, we couldn't possibly be staying in this box all night, could we? (however, everyone who has been in here so far have uttered that the room was pretty big.)" I believe he felt that way because normally, at home, we would leave our room and go to mom or dad's room, then downstairs, then out to the compound and what not and now it's like wtf? Also, there are many things on the floors for him to eat and the last thing I need in Osogbo is a sick puppy. By the way. He is six months today. Anyways, I will miss him dearly and I can't wait to see him.

I resume at my PPA(refer to previous posts for the meaning of this acronym) on Monday and I can't wait because I need something to do. I hate being idle. I have had amala like 2 days in a row now. I just can't get enuff :D

P.S: I still haven't found my crush. I didn't see him on the both days I went to the LG (refer to previous posts for the meaning of this acronym).

~kdamsel~

Happy New Year....Happy??

It's a new year but it feels like another day and I'm mad cuz people are very excited on BBM, but I don't share the same excitement. Instead, I'm in my room listening to Lady Antebellum and wanting to sleep, wake up in the morning and feel better. Plus, the bangas(fire crackers) won't stop and the sound is driving me nuts.

Why so blue?

I will be spending the new year's at my gram's house after 8 years. I'm quivering just writing about it. See the thing is, growing up, from the moment I can remember, grampa had always thrown a big party and people from all over come to celebrate at the house and we have a blast, stay awake new year's eve to watch the cow get killed(as brutal a that sounds) and the food get made till we no longer can stay awake. By 'we' I'm referring to the first 3 grandchildren from my maternal extended family; my brother, myself and my cuzin Busola. Now, Busola died April 24th, 2011 and I'm yet to see her siblings for the first time ever since. I don't know how I'll feel. It just can't be the same. I feel like everyone will miss her some more when they look at me seeing how we were born 50 days apart and raised practically like twins until my family moved to Toronto. Even after the move, we kept in touch, hung out every time I was in town and told each other everything. I feel like I might OD on memories tomorrow. I don't know how to function with that side of the family without her. First time ever, without her. I'm too close to the memory markers and it breaks my heart into pieces that I would just have to enjoy the day without my partner.

Secondly, it's getting closer to my move to Osun state to continue my NYSC and I'm nervous. The apartment I might have found might not be exactly what I wanted and I might have more people in my surroundings than anticipated. I'm bothered there might be some who don't like dogs and I hate restricting Jagger to a room or a small space. It breaks my heart also. I keep telling myself that Jagger and I are lovable entities, so, we'll be fine. I'm sure that would be the case. Mom packed many things I might need and we bought other items, which serves as a reminder that it's getting closer to moving. I'm part excited but nervous at the same time. I mean, it's one thing to move on my own but another thing to move on my own to Osun state. Dammit!!!

Anyways, I hope to go to sleep, wake up, get to my grams and find happiness and comfort in being with the fam rather than shedding tears at the demise of my cuzin and causing others to feel pain also . I want to remain strong for her siblings and everyone else.

R.I.P Omolola Oluwabusola Adetayo (April 27,1987 - April 24,2011). I will always remember.

So Help Me God.

On a brighter note, HAPPY NEW YEAR! Thankful to see another year alongside my loved ones.

~kdamsel~